


You Oughta Know

by bigembarrassingheart



Category: Stick It (2006)
Genre: F/F, Fake dating but in a gay way, Gay Stuff, Gen, Rated teen for swearing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-07-09
Updated: 2019-07-09
Packaged: 2020-06-25 10:22:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,461
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19743742
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/bigembarrassingheart/pseuds/bigembarrassingheart
Summary: Haley is finally happy, maybe, until her parents invite her to Thanksgiving and she has to wrangle a boyfriend.





	You Oughta Know

A year after all the crazy, Haley Graham finally felt like maybe she knew what she was doing. She was going to university with a gymnastics scholarships, hanging out with her friends, and not calling her parents.

Well, that is until they called her.

“Mom? Why are you calling me?” Haley asked, sitting up in bed, and grabbing her phone.  
“Hi, Haley! I’m just calling to make sure you’re coming to Thanksgiving.”

“Uh, I don’t know.” she said, silently groaning.  
“Haley, that is ridiculous. The whole family will be there, and you know your father and I are back together.”

“Ugh, ok, fine.”  
“Thank you. And bring that boyfriend of yours.” The phone clicked dead.

Later that day, Haley recounted the story to Mina and Wei Wei over lunch.  
“And she told me to bring my boyfriend! She knows I don’t have a boyfriend.” 

“What? Why?” Wei Wei asked, sipping from a smoothie.  
“I don’t know, to embarrass me, because she hates me?” God, she was riled up. That’s just what her mom did to her.

A few minutes later, Wei Wei went to go to the bathroom, and Mina leaned in to Haley.

“I just love her so much.” she smiled.  
“I can tell. You two are really good together.” Haley responded. 

“We’re taking things really slow, you know, it’s her first real relationship, my first relationship with a girl, but it’s going great.” 

“Well, you two make me feel like maybe life isn’t dead after all.”  
“Aww, come on,” Wei Wei said, sitting back down, “Isn’t there anyone you’re interested in?”

“I mean yeah, gymnastics is a very gay sport, but no one’s really interested in me.” Mina and Wei Wei both frowned. 

“You know, you should ask Poot to be your boyfriend for Thanksgiving.” Wei Wei suggested.  
“That’s actually a very good idea! My mom thinks he’s a no-good delinquent!”

Finally she had a solution, and for the rest of lunch Haley was able to focus on enjoying her friendship with Mina and Wei Wei. 

\----

Once she got home, Haley called Poot.

“Yo.” he said.  
“Yo,” she responded, “Hey, I need to ask you a favour. Can you pretend to be my boyfriend for Thanksgiving so my parents don’t humiliate me?”

She could hear him sighing into the phone, and could picture his exasperated face. 

“Ugh, why me?”  
“Uh, cause Wei Wei told me to ask you, and cause my mom thinks you’re a slacker skateboarding delinquent?”  
“I don’t even skateboard, bro! I’m a biker!”  
“I know, Poot, but what’s the problem?”

“I don’t want to cheat on Joanne!”  
“Firstly, it’s not cheating, and I thought you two were broken up?”

“Firstly, it still feels sketch to me, and we were, but we reconnected recently.”  
“Ugh! Stop with that fucking sappy romantic crap.”

“Oh, is that why you want me to pretend to be your boyfriend?” Poot asked.  
“What?”  
“You know, you’re secretly in love with me, so you wanna pull some fanfiction stunt and seduce me?”

Haley pretended to barf into the phone. “As if! I’m super gay, bro, and even if I was straight you’d be the last guy I’d date”

“Just making sure.” he said, “But seriously, bro, I wouldn’t feel right doing that. Why don’t you ask Frank?”  
“Ugh fine. You wanna go biking next week?”

“Sure.” 

Haley hung up and dialed Frank. God this was quickly becoming a giant fucking production.

“Yo” he said.  
“Yo,” she responded, “Hey, I need to ask you a favour. Can you pretend to be my boyfriend for Thanksgiving so my parents don’t humiliate me?”

“Let me guess, you already asked Poot but he’s too obsessed with Joanne so now you’re asking me, your last choice?”

“Don’t be so fucking melodramatic, Frank, you’ll get free food. Are you in?”   
“Ugh, fine. I’m not gonna pretend to be a douchebag or something though.”  
“Like you need to pretend. But yeah, my mom already thinks you’re a skateboarding delinquent so it’s cool.”

“I don’t skateboard.”  
“I know, Frank.” Haley said, laughing. “Me’n Poot are going biking next week, you in?”  
“Fuck yeah.” 

\----

Finally it was Thanksgiving. Frank picked Haley up in his terrible, shitty, van, and they made their way to her mom’s house. Neither of them dressed up for the occasion. 

“MCR? You’re so gay.” Frank said after Haley popped in a CD.  
“You know it.” Haley loved her friends so much. 

As they drove, they talked about everything. Frank was maybe dating a guy he met in a record store, and he really liked him. He also had some ideas of who to set Haley up with. Haley told him about gymnastics, all the moves she was practicing, and how awesome all of her teammates were. Frank told her about his classes, he was studying history and he was really enjoying it. 

But all too soon, they were pulling into the driveway of Haley’s mom’s house.

“Haley? I have to tell you something.” Frank said, turning off the car.  
“Yeah?” All of a sudden, things felt very serious.  
“I’m gay.”

She started laughing. “I know, Frank.”  
“I know that, I just need to put that out there one last time before I enter a house full of Texan suburban moms while I pretend to be straight to piss off your family.” 

“There’s gonna be some Texan suburban dads there too, don’t forget.”   
“I wouldn’t dare.” 

When Haley’s mom opened the door, she did a double take.  
“Mom, this is my boyfriend, Frank.” Haley said.  
“Oh of course, come on in, you two! Such a cute couple!” 

They were immediately paraded through every far-flung relative and family friend of the Grahams. 

“Haley! It’s been so long since I’ve seen you!” An aunt from New Mexico exclaimed, planting an uncomfortably wet kiss on her cheek. “Oh, and who is this?”

“Oh, this is my boyfriend, Frank.”  
“Boyfriend! You’re growing up so fast. Well, you two make a cute couple!” 

The second she was gone, Haley turned and grimaced to Frank.  
“We’re a cute couple? We’re standing two feet apart.”   
“The heterosexual audacity,” Frank said like a reflex, “You want food?”  
“Sure.”

Now alone, she now looked like a huge loser. Better than talking to relatives though. Even though Haley was only pretending to date Frank, it did feel nice that she didn’t appear like a lonely fuck to her family. 

Frank came back with some juice and rolls. Scarfing them down, everything was going fine until she saw her dad walking over. 

“Hi, Haley,” he said, “And Frank?”  
“He’s my boyfriend!” she quickly responded. Her dad raised his eyebrows but didn’t say anything. 

“Uh, Haley, can I talk to you privately for a sec?” hHe asked.   
“Yeah, okay,” Haley said, walking away from Frank a little too slowly, “What?” she said angrily.

“Jeez! I see you haven’t grown out your anger. But anyways, I was wondering if there was anything you, uh, wanted to tell me?” 

Haley narrowed her eyes as her mom strolled up beside them.  
“Hi, guys.” she said, all perfect smile. 

“Hi, sweetheart. I’m just asking Haley if there’s anything she wants to tell us.”   
“Well, you can quit wasting your time, cause, uh, there isn’t!” Haley exclaimed, leading to a look of disdain from both of them.

“All we’re asking is, well, is Frank really your boyfriend?” he asked quietly.   
“Yes, he is!”   
“Are you sure?” she replied, dropping her voice to a whisper, “Because to be honest, you always seemed very gay to us.” 

“What the fuck?” Haley exploded. “Firstly, that’s not true, and secondly, how is that any of your fucking business?” Their faces were red as she got louder. Frank looked over with a concerned expression.

“That’s not very lady-like language, is it Haley?” he said.  
“And listen, okay, the only reason I asked you to bring your boyfriend was so you would have to admit the truth to yourself. You know, you’ve never had a boyfriend, and you spend all of your time with boys.”  
“You’ve caused us so much grief throughout the years.”

“Oh my fucking god!” Haley started screaming, and everyone turned to look, “You two are out of your fucking minds! You’re just causing me unnecessary pain and trying to manipulate me into what? Admitting I’m a lesbian so you can never speak to me again? Well, guess what? I am fucking gay, and I’ll make it easy for you. I never fucking want to see you again!”

And with that, Haley stomped away, grabbing Frank’s hand, and walked away. 

“That was badass!” Frank exclaimed once they were driving away.  
“God, I hate those fuckers! Their social standing is gonna be ruined!” she said, smiling. Now, Haley was finally free, and with her friends, and she was so happy.


End file.
